Just Grateful
Every day there is something else to be thankful to Mikel for giving me. There are things he taught me, things that he paid for from his hospital bed, people who have helped me after Mikel's death that I never would have even known without him, and lessons that I've learned as a result of knowing him that have forever changed me.
This week has been surprisingly busy and very fulfilling; it had to be. Tuesday after forcing myself out of the mire I'd been in for two weeks, allowing myself to wallow in the miserable knowledge that he was gone and would never be coming back, I went with our life insurance agent, a woman whose son mowed our lawn in exchange for tutoring in math and English, out to breakfast.
We were at the delicious Real Food Cafe, which is the cutest little diner in the state and always busy. I forced down memories of eating there frequently with Michael, and enjoyed my favorite meal. Christine and I actually had a lot to talk about; I could have stayed there drinking coffee and chatting all day long, but there were things to do.
She took me to the County Clerk's office to take care of some last details with Michael and brought me home. I never would have met her had Michael not made the first deal with her to tutor her son in math, dragging himself to a community meeting I had not felt like going to!
I also never would have become such good friends with Christine that she gave me a sturdy metal file cabinet and hanging files! Talk about getting exactly what I needed to start my life over; what could be better than organizers? Yesterday another neighbor dropped me off at the medical center Michael introduced me to. I had a very productive two appointments there, one of which led to a much-needed prescription for a sleep aide:)
I had the presence of mind to take with me an application for "special" transportation the Disabled alone can use in lieu of the city bus. Although I'm learning the city buses just fine thanks to the "pop quizzes" he would give me about how to get one place or another:) "Pop quiz: how do you get to Woodland Mall from our house?" Why, take the Burton bus of course! Finding my way back home from the doctors' was a piece of cake; I even stopped early to get stamps from the post office that's north of home.
Also this whole month, I have enjoyed the simple pleasure of having the mortgage paid; that was one of the last bills Michael took care of, using a laptop we'd purchased together, while he dealt with all he had to in the hospital. I also have not had to worry about the electric bill this month either; that was another gift he gave me. He must have known I would have way too much on my mind in July to add financial concerns to the list.
Just this morning, his former aide picked up my prescription for me so I wouldn't have to brave the heat and humidity:) She worked for him through the Department of Human Services, an organization I've made a point of not associating with if I can help it. Our paths might never have crossed had I not fallen madly in love. Now she's just my friend, who shares the joyful/painful experience of knowing such a wonderful person who died far too young. But what gifts he gave me! They are just beginning to show themselves. Who knows what life will be like for me in a year, thanks to the pearls of wisdom he shared.
This week has been surprisingly busy and very fulfilling; it had to be. Tuesday after forcing myself out of the mire I'd been in for two weeks, allowing myself to wallow in the miserable knowledge that he was gone and would never be coming back, I went with our life insurance agent, a woman whose son mowed our lawn in exchange for tutoring in math and English, out to breakfast.
We were at the delicious Real Food Cafe, which is the cutest little diner in the state and always busy. I forced down memories of eating there frequently with Michael, and enjoyed my favorite meal. Christine and I actually had a lot to talk about; I could have stayed there drinking coffee and chatting all day long, but there were things to do.
She took me to the County Clerk's office to take care of some last details with Michael and brought me home. I never would have met her had Michael not made the first deal with her to tutor her son in math, dragging himself to a community meeting I had not felt like going to!
I also never would have become such good friends with Christine that she gave me a sturdy metal file cabinet and hanging files! Talk about getting exactly what I needed to start my life over; what could be better than organizers? Yesterday another neighbor dropped me off at the medical center Michael introduced me to. I had a very productive two appointments there, one of which led to a much-needed prescription for a sleep aide:)
I had the presence of mind to take with me an application for "special" transportation the Disabled alone can use in lieu of the city bus. Although I'm learning the city buses just fine thanks to the "pop quizzes" he would give me about how to get one place or another:) "Pop quiz: how do you get to Woodland Mall from our house?" Why, take the Burton bus of course! Finding my way back home from the doctors' was a piece of cake; I even stopped early to get stamps from the post office that's north of home.
Also this whole month, I have enjoyed the simple pleasure of having the mortgage paid; that was one of the last bills Michael took care of, using a laptop we'd purchased together, while he dealt with all he had to in the hospital. I also have not had to worry about the electric bill this month either; that was another gift he gave me. He must have known I would have way too much on my mind in July to add financial concerns to the list.
Just this morning, his former aide picked up my prescription for me so I wouldn't have to brave the heat and humidity:) She worked for him through the Department of Human Services, an organization I've made a point of not associating with if I can help it. Our paths might never have crossed had I not fallen madly in love. Now she's just my friend, who shares the joyful/painful experience of knowing such a wonderful person who died far too young. But what gifts he gave me! They are just beginning to show themselves. Who knows what life will be like for me in a year, thanks to the pearls of wisdom he shared.
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