Broken Lives Matter

Changed my url address at long last, so thought I'd celebrate with a late night post at the new home. Videos such as these break my heart. I stuggle with the exact same problems as this sweet boy, though not to the same degree. Sometimes it takes me three or four times to successfully rise from a seated position! At church, singing hymns, we are always told to "please stand if you are able." Sometimes they still say "if you are able" before the national anthem at sporting events. So why, Colin Kaepernick, would you ever, as an able-bodied adult, regardless of the cruelties you have no doubt endured as a black man, exercise those same cruelties right back at the disabled community, by casually ignoring THEIR ongoing struggle? It is something that's bothered me for the longest time, and why I can not support, Kaepernick's campaign, though as a similarly marginalized minority I DO understand it.

Almost forgot! This is from yesterday at the Main branch of the Grand Rapids Public Library. It is the use of the handicapped stall in the ladies' room the way it was intended for the elderly and disabled. Not so you could make yourself more comfortable while taking your time in there, as those who REALLY need the space wait outside. And rest assured, in public spaces such as a library or an office, there will ALWAYS be somebody who needs the big stall more than you want it. So be courteous, okay?

And now, after another varied and fulfilling day downtown, let me say thanks to the Asian-Pacific Festival organizers (one of whom I met tonight at a museum event) and The New Hotel Mertens, who (though new in town) have rapidly become my favorite place to show off my city, Grand Rapids, Michigan. Although in some ways I am lucky because my disability requires a mobility aid, making everyone around me more than eager to help make MY life easier, some disabilities, like perhaps a reading difficulty or a visual impairment, are not as obvious to others. That's why a small, written description of events, or something as simple as a phone number to call if ever I need some one's assistance getting in the door, is hugely appreciated!! You can't imagine what it means to be considered in this world. Don't just assume I have it all figured out! Extending a kind hand changes my whole day:)

Sharing, 'cause I love libraries, and I find them for the most part to be extremely accessible. The biggest inconvenience can be taking a ramp that is off to the side and up a monstrous hill that is difficult to scale when you're already tired from pushing your "aide" to the library itself. BUT, the button to open doors for the disabled is a wonderful reward once you have:)

Weather Channel.com is saying mold spores and tree pollen--the two WORST allergens as far as I'm concerned--are extremely high outside. And I can see there's a healthy stirring the trees behind my building. But I can't "cancel today." Unlike other days, when I have the distinct luxury of choosing to stay in if I want--tonight I have things I want to do. Life is what you make it, after all, a fact I learned from Michael, who despite his paraplegia made the most of every day. He was rolling his wheelchair from before dawn 'til after dusk. I never appreciated it then, living with him in a government subsidized two bedroom apartment, but I definitely do now. He never complained about anything he had to deal with--and ladies and gentleman, he dealt with a lot. Nor did he let anything he dealt with stop him from doing whatever he wanted to do. I was so proud of him. Proud to be with him. He made me feel important just because I stood beside him. How does a person ...

This time of year I miss my fiancé acutely. Scrolling Facebook I found this little video. I think it says it all:(

Hello Lovelies! Yesterday and last night were pretty much devoted elsewhere; I didn't have time to rest and blog:( I DID however visit my beloved Urban Institute for Contemporary Arts (UICA), for the opening reception of their latest exhibit, featuring the photography of Bangladesh! It's a modern little art museum with an abiding interest insocial issues. They treat me like family every time I'm there--which is often. The evening was splendid (to use one of "my" words). I chatted, ate fried onion fritters, drank white wine, and conversed with a new friend and fellow lover of art and travel on the breezy, minimalist terrace. The UICA are barrier free, which I love, and I have absolutely no problem walking right up to the disabled access button out front and letting myself in. I've heard from some that parking can be an issue though, so I'm going to work on becoming part of the committee who discusses problems of accessibility at the museum. A place tha...

I've had a wonderfully rich morning. Rich, you ask? Well certainly not monetarily (unfortunately). But in terms of teaching me things I didn't know before, and giving me a new perspective. I went to a special tour of a new art exhibit hosted by the art museum I belong to, focused entirely on the fascinating photography of Bangladeshi artists. As a kid I learned that every time you learn something new, you get a wrinkle in your brain. My brain got very "wrinkly" this morning! Some of the photography was a bit disturbing. One image in particular has been featured in magazines, and it brought me very close to tears. I'm sure that's what the photographer hoped would happen! Because at the heart of it, photographs--even the heart-wrenching ones--just make us more aware of what we didn't know before, right? They illuminate a struggle, hardship, tragedy--or a miracle--we weren't aware of. That's what another series of pictures forced on me. The museum...

I had to share this video; she's exactly what I want to be! She's making it clear what the physically disabled go through, and trying to make the world a better place for all of us:)

Good morning! The weather here is gorgeous, if a little hot and muggy. But this is the second day of said conditions, so I'm hoping the rain that's forecast tonight comes harder and more intensely for the two days of build up! Weighing on my mind this morning is the idea of the victim mentality. Many people have it, particularly in the neighborhood where I live. And I'm not just referring to the mindset that the world owes them something. I'm talking about the idea that the world is against us, that we're already beaten by life. And it occurs to me that I must make a conscious effort NOT to allow my blog to sound "whiny". In fact I've made it kind of a personal crusade not to whine myself--often to my own detriment when I let it keep me from asking for help. Let me be clear for the first (and probably not the last) time since re-inventing this blog as a reflecting pool for the daily struggles faced by the Disabled in America. I'm not trying to s...

Waiting on groceries! Thank God so many stores around this nation have finally started acknowledging the struggle of those without transportation! With the busses running again, I could do my own shopping, of course, but in the monstrous heat wave we're experiencing, waiting for the bus at either end of an elongated trip to get a couple groceries that might go bad by the time I finally get them home--doesn't sound like fun:( I'm more than happy to wait at my home for groceries to be delivered from one of the bigger stores. Today I also discovered that my walker (and presumably those of everyone who uses one) puts me at a prime level to get grit and dust from the street blown up into my eyes. Oh the life of a permanent pedestrian! And the only way to avoid the inconvenience would be to give up and be a shut-in. No thank you! I'll take the good with the bad. I praise God that I'm not living on the street, like so many people around my building. They seem to come out...

Happy Memorial Day!! I'm enjoying being "grounded" by a city bus that isn't running today. Of course on principle, I don't begrudge anybody their extra day off. Lord knows we could all use a little rest! But I've found that this decision by the only mode of transportation for some, has created a big stir among those of us with very few options. When I first read the bus line's post on Facebook that they'd be closed for Memorial Day, I commented "Great, not like any of us have places to go that day"...thinking about events within the city that I wouldn't mind going to, or that I might like to get groceries that day--or something. To my surprise, I got a fair amount of replies! From there the conversation just took off. The first reply was "...or jobs they still need to get to." Imagine the trouble. You don't have a car, the bus isn't running, and maybe an Uber or Lyft isn't an option either! So what do you do? As...

Here's another poem of the day! I read it less as a statement of what kind of person the speaker was, than as a call to action. This being Sunday and me being a Christian with a disability, I take that to mean a call to love those who struggle with disabilities of any kind, and help them love themselves. Credo [written in the 1800s] Alfred Kreymborg I sing the will to love: the will that carves the will to live, the will that saps the will to hurt, the will that kills the will to die; the will that made and keeps you warm, the will that points your eyes ahead, the will that makes you give, not get, a give and get that tell us what you are: how much a god, how much a human. I call on you to live the will to love.

I found this an encouraging piece of news...but it's a little disheartening. Like so many other marginalized groups, we the Disabled are only recognized by society if we have ATHLETIC prowess. Those of with beautiful minds, whose strength lies in intelligence, are ignored. I think of 9 year old Anastasia Somoza. Her speech during the 2016 Democratic Convention captivated me. Yet every time I mention her name and aptitude to some one, they stare at me blankly. I do think it's wonderful someone with a disability is gaining national attention for simply being drafted onto a pro football team, I also notice that Shaquem Griffin is older, and also a member of a racial minority. Does that make it more "socially acceptable" to laud his achievements than those of Somoza? Here is the article on Griffin: And here is an article about Somova: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/eric-mink/9-year-old-girl-visits-wh_b_11297566.html This discrepancy exacerbates a unique problem ...

I follow a site called Poets.org; every day I receive a new poem and new insights. Today this one really spoke to me. The poet's information on the piece below reflects that the inspiration for HER was the #MeToo project. I thought how the poem kind of speaks to all who struggle in this world, particularly those who suffer in silence. Because our silence has continued for so long, I thought this shone excellent light on our issues: http://academyofamericanpoets.cmail20.com/t/ViewEmail/y/6D21B3B3DCFAB8DF/75D3B7B62AB6FF3E33C48669A65BFAC1

Hello! I've emerged from hibernation with renewed purpose. Recently, my search for advocacy and disability rights support has taken on a sharper focus. I don't want ONLY the ability to marry whomever I want now, without fear of losing the benefits granted me by law...I want equal recognition in this country! And it's a long road. One article I found particularly piqued my interest. Written four years ago, it high lights that even at that time, we were fighting a brick wall: Stay with me on this fight, and tell your friends! The time for silence has passed.

Our house closing draws nearer and nearer by the second. The date is set for Wednesday morning, and renovations to make it accessible for Mikel (and more comfortable for me) will begin that very day! The thought is thrilling and scary at the same time--as so many things in life are--and it sometimes feels like we'll never get everything into boxes before we make our quiet departure. Really though, despite the stress, and knowing that buying this house will put a considerable dent in our collective finances, Mikel and I are beyond excited. We have both always dreamed of having a home of our own and the amazing freedom that comes with it. Between packing we have gone through paint colors and talked about where we're going to place furniture. Last week I bought a tiny little red tea rose plant that I intend to train onto a trellis beside the garage. Sort of a symbol of who lives there; our song is "Red is the Rose"--the traditional Irish ballad. Indeed, if couples ha...